Worries and Anxieties

Wanting my life to be free from negative thoughts, yet I could not help but feel this way now. It seems like my confidence is slowly fading away. Leaving me trampled and grasping. These instances lead me into looking at myself more. I was indeed taken over by such emptiness. Again asking the questions “where am I now?… what have I gained from life?”

Nothing.
Nowhere.

Fears and worries starts to enclose my being. It’s not about phobia. It’s about imperfections that I carry. Something that I hated about myself. Oh well… enough.

[creeps in the corner and wallows in self-pity]

Another Day

Sleepiness. But not tired
Maybe just fed up
Listless.

Seems that everyday is just becoming another day. A day that would simply pass and go. Conciously counting the days before the month turns. Overwhelmed by how fast time takes its flight. I have gone from desiring to dreaming. Yet life had lead me into here. Simply my responsiblity, my choice. A discernment that I have failed to spread my wings. It’s not failure, it’s the lack of drive. Losing the passion and the endeavor to achieve a sense of fullfillment.

Where am I now?
Where am I going?

Mind Exercise

The past few days had made me pre-occupied with Weffriddles. It’s a mind puzzling game, a very clever collection of puzzles. You really need to use your mind and do analysis on each level. My officemate had sent the link and we are figuring out every answer to level. Sometimes the answers are just there, sometimes hidden, sometimes it is very complex. It puts the mind to work really. There are levels which would drive you nuts that you just want to quit. Such amazing mind the creator have!

Health is Wealth

I always remind myself to bring our kids to the doctor for their check-up. Health is more important than anything else. It is said the prevention is better than cure. My husband and I just brought our kids to the hospital for immunization. It is heartbreaking to see them crying while being injected. It’s painful but I know the pain is worth it. It’s for their own good. There are still more vaccines needed by my baby boy and every month we would be visitng his pedia. I was stunned when his pedia told me of the new Prevnar vaccine that my kids need. One shot costs 5000 pesos! Whew ang mahal! My baby boy needs 2 shots while my little girl needs only 1. Hayyy grabe talaga! And I ask myself… “paano naman kami magkakapera ng marami?”.

Joining MyLot

I recently joined the MyLot community. MyLot is similar to a forum, and the only difference is that you get paid for taking part in the discussions. It’s where you could start a discussion, post responses or comments and refer friends in order to receive earnings.

How do you get paid?
You could get paid with a  minimum account balance of $10. If you refer others, you get 25% of what they earn. They calculate earnings based on how useful and relevant your responses are. Payment is made either through PayPal or E-gold account.

I don’t know if MyLot would work for me, but I’ll give it a try.

Beauty, Body and Brains

[body]
I told myself I would eat less. People say that I’m not that fat and some thinks I am sexy (whooo) even if I’ve already given birth. It doesn’t matter, it’s just their thought anyway. But I need to be more disciplined. But who wouldn’t love to eat sweets? I’m a choco-holic and I’ve got a sweet tooth. I am not getting any younger so I need to check everything I take. People say that it’s hard to maintain your weight when you reach the age of 30. And that would be 3 years from now!

Years ago, my office attire is smart-casual. Now I get to dress down. Everyday is jeans day for me. Working  in a manufacturing company for 3 years had changed my outfit. I now consider jeans an office wear. It’s our office uniform so it means I have to follow rules.

[beauty]
My daily routine just consists of a moisturizer, an eye cream and a body lotion. I don’t wear make up on a daily basis. If I wear one, it’s not too much. For me, it’s just face powder and lip gloss. I’m happy with that. I am confident with how I look.

[brains]
I am fond of learning. In fact, I love going to school. I am not satisfied with my degree in Engineering. It had been my plan to take up a masteral’s degree. It had been a dream for me. If I have the means I would pursue it. However, being married and having my own family have been my priority. I would set my dream aside. Saving for the future of my kids is more important than my own. They need it more than I do. Each night, putting my kids to sleep makes me teary-eyed because of happiness.
I’ve learned.
I’ve learned to sacrifice.
I’ve learned to give more.

A Promo and A Sountrack

[Cebu Pacific Promo]
For a week I have been reading and hearing about the Cebu Pacific mania. Recently I’ve read that the Cebu Pacific promo have been been extended unitl March 11. Lucky for those who  have enough money to spend. How I love to book a flight and be on vacation with my family either in Singapore or Hongkong, Unfortunately as much as I wanted to, I could not. I just succumb to that fact that my kids are still too young to enjoy such places. Putting into mind the word “perhaps, in the future”.

I love to travel and visit places! Thankful I had the chance to visit Hongkong (during my elementary days), Singapore and Brunei (during my college days). There was no Disneyland yet at HongKong. My parents are well-enough during those times. I had still had in my memory the places we had visited and the fun times we had. What I loved most:

at HongKong – Ocean Park, the cable cars, shopping for toys at Toys R Us
at Singapore – Singapore Zoo, Night Safari, Jurong Bird Park
at Brunei – Jerudong Park

Now, going on a vacation is a dream for my family.
Sigh… Sana nga makapagbakasyon kami someday.
And this means, money and savings.

[Music and Lyrics]
musiclyrics.jpg

I’ve been living with a shadow, over head
I’ve been sleeping with a cloud, above my bed
I’ve been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can’t seem to move on

I’ve been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
just in case I ever need them again someday
I’ve been setting aside time
to clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can’t make through without a way back into love……

I love to listen to the song, Way Back into Love, from the movie Music and Lyrics, which stars Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore. I find the song pleasing and sweet. But, I haven’t watched this movie (hmmm, mid-last year pa yata last movie na napanood ko sa sine… hehe).

This is the type of movie I wanted, the sappy-romantic ones. Pero ewan ko ba, I’m just not fond now of going to the movie theater and sit an hour or two for a movie. Sometimes, my husband feels like watching a movie in the theater but I don’t want to. I was always thinking that it’s more worthy to spend time with my kids or buy some things for them. And I love shopping more than watching a movie.

Home at Last!

Finally, we’ve already moved in. We’re now residing at Citihomes, Mandaluyong City. We’re at the 9th floor, so it means that everyday we would be taking the elevator. Some units in that floor aren’t occupied yet. It’s a quiet residential place with lots of rules to follow. The good thing is that it’s a safe place. Every cluster has a guard house which is equipped with a security camera.

The nearest food establishments is located along Mandaluyong circle. Medyo malayo lang sa sakayan. Siguro nasanay lang ako sa Makati na paglabas ng bahay may tricyle agad at malapit sa mga convenience stores and fastfood chains.

This morning, my travel time is more or less 30 minutes. I must get used to walking and taking the pedicab and tricycle. I would also anticipate the rainy season! I hate commuting and I hate commuting during rainy seasons even more! I just have to get used to living here.

At Citadel Inn

Moved in temporarily at Citadel Inn. We’ll be staying there until Saturday. The place is just a street and a few steps near our office! Ang saya… sobrang lapit ko talaga!

My parents already transferred at Mandaluyong. The unit that we’ll be staying is still undergoing some minor improvements. Hopefully and finally we would move in and settle on Sunday. But then after that, I’ll be having a hard time going to work. For sure, I’m gonna be late most of the time. Ayoko pa naman ng nagcocomute! Hayyy…


 

Saying Hi!

Recently, I read a message from someone in my Friendster account.  I didn’t realize that someone gets to read my entries from time to time. Yes, I don’t mind it at all. It’a nice to know that someone appreciates my blog.

My blog is just about anything. Just about my simple life, my thoughts and feelings.  Anyway, I just want to say hi to you, Adel. Hope you’ll always have a good day ahead!